The world is constantly changing and evolving, with that technology is often steps ahead of us. We generally can get our hands on pretty much anything or anyone with an app or a swipe, minimal effort, maximum reward. It seems like things should be easier and easier, but there are still a few things that the newest, latest, and most advanced just don’t seem to keep up with. One of those things is finding your perfect partner.
I’m not even talking about the human variety. That can seemingly, easily be done via websites and apps that come out more often than I get Omaha Steaks coupons in the mail. We equestrians even have our very own sites and apps now, equestriandating.com, equestriancupid.com, the Horsey Hotties app, and even the Muddy Match app. In theory, we should be able to track down our horse-loving soul mates by barely moving our fingers. So why is it, in all of our advancements, we haven’t produced an app to match humans with horses?
In our lifetime, it’s expected to have multiple horsey connections. As much as we’d love for them to live as long as we do, even our beloved four-legged soul mates eventually move on to greener pastures long before we’d want them to, leaving us looking for another.
In this app, the human would be asked questions about breed, age, color, and size preferences. They would describe their chosen or desired disciplines, and what they were seeking in an “ideal mate.” The human would need to describe themselves and their personalities, what traits they appreciate or admire, and those they often butt heads with. They would talk about prior accomplishments and future goals, and most importantly what kind of budget they have planned for their new partner.
The horse would need to include several photos to show physical features, and a few candids that display personality never hurt (let’s hope they exercise better discretion than humans, no tacky bathroom mirror photos, no group shots with a bunch of obnoxious friends, all hay-drunk). They’d offer a brief description of their basic statistics, any training they’ve had, and any achievements. There would need to be a personal side to it-written from their point of view, with the aide of a handler, much better skilled at typing. A section to talk about who their dream human would be any why, what they’d hope to accomplish together (let’s win the World!), what they’d enjoy doing together in their free time (I enjoy sunset trail rides and gummy bears).
Maybe it’s out there, though a quick search on my iPhone speaks to the contrary, but if not… Hey all you app developers, I see an untapped market here. Call me!